Tag: Challenge

Last week’s challenge was all about watching and noting the ways that children interact with the adults in their spaces. As I wrote, this is always a revelatory experience for me–and when I did the challenge myself, I found that this time was no different. It was a good reminder to try to make it clear to my child when I *am* available to chat (while I sit on the floor folding laundry, for instance) and when I am not (while I try to make an important phone call). It gave me a few ideas of practical changes to make to the house (the just-turned-toddler needs a taller footstool to reach the bathroom sink). It also inspired me again to make sure that I am allowing the children to see me focusing on my own work–modeling is important, and I feel like it is something I could do better.

How did it go for you last week? Did you find any helpful tidbits? Did your tallying make you more aware of the ways you interact with your child? Feel free always to reach out in the comments and share more about how your week went!

Challenge 2: Start writing things down.

We’re going to continue gradually building up our observation habit. This requires zero “formal” observation. Here is what I want you to do: get a notebook and start writing things down. In my Casa, I kept my notebook with my lesson plans, so my assistant or I could easily rush over and jot something down if inspiration struck us. At home, sometimes I keep a little notebook in my back pocket–a small moleskine or a picadilly, or even a memo pad can work for this purpose. I also keep a notebook on my side table nearest the seat in which I am most likely to sit while I watch my children.

Focus on jotting down:

-Things your child that seem important to them, that make you smile, that let you know you need to work on grace and courtesy.

-Errors you notice happening that you’d like to offer a reminder on at a later time.

-Brand new interests you see in the child that you might like to find ways to help them engage with.

That’s it! Try to get at least one thing down on paper each day. To remind you of why this is important, at the end of the week, read through your notes, and note down at least one thing that you will do with your child/in your environment that was informed by what you saw.

This challenge comes as the final piece of a whole month of writing I did on observation! If you want to know more about who, why, how, what, when and where to observe, I hope you’ll go back and give that primer a read!

When I took my Montessori training, we spent the first two months head down learning theory. We watched perfectly honed presentations on pristine materials in exceptional prepared environments populated only by adults. We heard lectures from experienced and masterful trainers (Thanks Joen and Connie!). We read and wrote and studied, and read and wrote and studied some more. It was an exceptional amount of work. And then, just at the right time, we got sent out to observe in actual classrooms. A chance to be in the real Casa, with real children, watching real adults. A breath of fresh air. The pedagogy made live. Our trainers sent us out with specific tasks for our two weeks–to look at key pieces of the environment, the human tendencies, the sensitive periods, the pedagogy–and in doing so, begin the true scientific preparation of the guide. None of what I have written here could exist without those trainers, or that experience.

Similarly, here in this blog, I started 2019 off with some deep dive into theory, discussing the importance of observation. I’ve written about the conceptual and the practical–but thus far, it’s all been hypothetical. Today, I am going to challenge you to take what I’ve discussed into your home.

Challenge 1: Tally the adult interactions.

One of my colleagues suggested this challenge to me some years back, and while I had never considered it previously, once she told me about it and I tried it, it made PERFECT sense. This is a great challenge for when you are just starting to observe and are looking for easy and clear feedback. It is going to help you observe the ways your child is independent and ALSO provide input on what you can do to provide more independence. Want to know if your space is functional for your child? Curious as to what your child is interested in these days? This can provide insight!

Take a piece of paper, and divide it into 4 sections. You can make a pretty chart on Google Docs or you can draw a 2×2 table by hand like I did. At the top of each section, write what your children typically come to you for throughout the day. “Manual/Practical Assistance, Emotional Support, Conversations, and Social Assistance” are some categories that come quickly to my mind. If you have younger children or an only child, maybe social assistance isn’t something you need to record–you can fill in the box with something else. The KEY is to think of general categories for the ways you interact with your children.

As you observe, start tallying. For the purposes of my family, I will tally in the afternoon–this is when my oldest is home from school. Maybe throughout the course of the week you will want to observe one day in the morning (8-12), one day in the afternoon (12-4), and one day in the evening (4-8). Maybe you will want to observe at the same time every day. Both are valuable! It’s okay if you aren’t catching every instance–just do your best. You can even use the same sheet for several days–switch up the ink if you can.

Here’s an example (edited for my children’s privacy, but based on the real deal):

I like to tally and then make a small note about what they came for. Over the course of the week, you are going to start seeing trends. My eldest child needed easy access to scotch tape, I learned. And also some new snack options (the number of times they came to me telling me that “nothing in their little kitchen looked appealing” was astonishing). They needed assistance protecting work from their younger sibling, and maybe a grace and courtesy reminder on how to offer affection. Though I didn’t record times, I noticed that my child came to me for emotional support, conversations, and check-ins more often as we neared bedtime. Our conversations let me know that they are really interested in telling time. They think asteroids are UNBELIEVABLE. They think that their younger sibling is sort of a toddler and sort of a baby.

It’s not that you are trying to eliminate your child’s need to interact with you–that’s neither practical nor desirable. You want to eliminate obstacles to your child’s independence, and find the best way to ensure that the interactions you do have are quality. When a child can complete tasks independently, it is easier for them to concentrate; it lets them know that they ARE capable and that we know they are, too.

I hope you will take the time to try out this first challenge, and I can’t wait to hear what you find out! Come back next week for our 2nd observation task! -Kari